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Is sex before marriage always wrong? What if the couple is very committed to each other? Are there any exceptions to this?
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Pastor Doug: Hi Enoch, welcome.
Enoch: Hey, thanks for taking my call. So here’s what I’m going to say to make it very quick. Marriage seem like a business to me, how do we know for a fact, that when the bible talks about fornication, that it means, sex before marriage being a sin? Because I consider some sex before marriage a sin but what if it is a guy and a girl that are very, very faithful to each other, and you can have 2 people who are married and cheat on each other constantly. So is sex before marriage really a sin because I think it’s absurd to say it is? What are your thoughts Doug?
Pastor Doug: Well you’ll think I’m absurd, but it’s pretty consistent in the bible that, that, becoming one flesh and joining together in Marriage, it even says “that Joseph knew not Mary, until Jesus was born” because, you know, there was something sacred about that, but the idea of 2 people coming together in sexual intimacy like that was, these 2 people threw an act of love, they’re becoming one flesh, they co, they procreate in their own image by combining who they are, the cells come together and, it’s just a miracle, how 2 people, 2 separate individuals can combine their essence somehow, and it becomes another person, a child in their image, and that’s one of the ways that God made man in His image, is that man is able to procreate in his own image, though love. So, for people to recklessly use that gift in that sacred, it’s, you know, sex is a good thing, within marriage, but to use it just for selfish gratification, without the protection of a family, you can look in our culture today and saw these kids that are born in families, not always, but largely because of promiscuity, and they grow up without fathers, sometimes without mothers and that was never God’s plan, we need that whole unit.
Enoch: I mean, I agree with you on that, in that sense but, like what if, you know, I have a girl, a girlfriends, like a very serious girlfriend and I don’t.
Pastor Doug: But why don’t you get married, why don’t you wait?
Enoch: Because it just doesn’t seem.
Pastor Doug: It’s hard.
Enoch: It seems like a business, it just seems like a business.
Pastor Doug: (Laughing)
Enoch: I don’t know, it just doesn’t seem right.
Pastor Doug: Well it’s a sacred ceremony, if you want to call it a business but, you know, it tells us that were planned, you look in the bible, with Jacob, “He worked 7 years and waited for Rachel, he worked and waited 7 years for his wedding night because, you know, he needed to kind of earned the right and to be able to have that relationship”. So, you know, in the bible, it’s pretty clear that, when 2 people come together. In some countries, when people came together without the benefit of ceremony, they were declared married because they just said, “Look, if you’re going to have that kind of relationship that has the potential of producing children, you need to become a family unit and get married”. I would wonder, why would you want to have that kind of a relationship with a woman, if you don’t want to marry that?
Pastor Doug: So, you know, the bible is pretty clear on this, both New and Old Testament, and we do have, actually a book we can send you, I just wrote, well, it’s been a few months now, but it’s talking about, “Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage”, it just talks about, purpose of marriage is addressed in that book. We’ll send you a free copy Enoch, if you call the number.
Pastor Jëan Ross: The number is 800-8356747; you can ask for the book “Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage”, number again, 800-8356747.